BBB AUTISM SUPPORT NETWORK/
AUTISM SOCIETY ONTARIO -
YORK REGION CHAPTER
PRESENT
THE E-NEWS
http://www.bbbautism.com/about_bbb.htm

Volume 3; Issue 1                                                            December 3, 2001

PREVENTING OVER-STIMULATION  by ASO York President Cindi

For the past couple of years, I've hosted two separate Christmas dinners (one for my family on Christmas Day and another for my husband's family on a day that we all agree on).  It may sound like a lot of work -- actually it is! -- but I find that A copes better at home and the extra work is well worth my sanity.  When he has 'had enough' of cousins/aunts/uncles/bright lights/new toys that overstimulate/etc, he just retreats to a quiet area of the house to re-group.

My sisters-in-law are amazing and have started a tradition of "pitching in" by bringing hors d'oeuvres or dessert, or a vegetable dish, etc. to help take the load off of me.

PUTTING IT ALL TO MUSIC; SPREADING AWARENES AND SMILES

By Amy Ames, music producer, recording artist, songwriter, math teacher and the mother of an autistic child.

I wrote a story and put it into a song titled, "Autism and Christmas".   You can hear a sample of the song at http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/amyames2.  The song is mostly true about my son going ballistic on Christmas.  I think it will put some humor into a very difficult time. 

After what happened two years ago Christmas, we are going very simple this year.  We're putting up a fake tree just plain (absolutely no lights please).  Then my son can put on a few ornaments and that's it.  Our doctor told us to block off one decorated room from our son.  We know that won't work, so we're making it real simple. 

AUTISM AND CHRISTMAS (3:54)
Written by Amy Ames

Autism and Christmas just do not mix. Our son went ballistic. It was a sad sight to witness. Too much stimulation, decorations and gifts, I think next Christmas we'll just sing bible hymns.

Well, this Christmas we spent with Grandma Alice.
She spent the whole month decorating for the kids.
And in an instance, our son Sam, may I mention, stole Christmas and the label of Autism.

Autism and Christmas just do not mix. Our son went ballistic. It was a sad sight to witness. Too much stimulation, decorations and gifts, I think next Christmas we'll just sing bible hymns.

No sooner as we got inside, we heard footsteps on the roof. The kids got excited and yelled, "Hay, that's Rudolf's hooves!" We all ran outside to view a scary sight. There hanging off the edge was Sam unscrewing all the Christmas lights.

Autism and Christmas just do not mix. Our son went ballistic. It was a sad sight to witness. Too much stimulation, decorations and gifts, I think next Christmas we'll just sing bible hymns.

At last, Santa came with presents and good cheer.
It wasn't long before we noticed Sammy wasn't here.
He was found holding a taillight and a grill.
Oh, my Lord, he striped Santa's automobile.

Autism and Christmas just do not mix. Our son went ballistic. It was a sad sight to witness. Too much stimulation, decorations and gifts, I think next Christmas we'll just sing bible hymns.

Then, Sammy took the presents and stacked them like a tower. When we got close to them, he screamed and hollered. Grandma Alice got tired and said she had to rest.
That's when Sam took apart all her toilets.

Well, it was time for the family to leave. No one doubted Sammy's disability.
"And can you imagine," said Grandma Alice at the door,
"Tomorrow's Sam's birthday, and he's only turning four."

Autism and Christmas just do not mix. Our son went ballistic. It was a sad sight to witness. Too much stimulation, decorations and gifts, I think next Christmas we'll just sing bible hymns.

 

Reprinted with permission from the author

 KEEPING IT LOW KEY By BBB Member Lynn

For D, I need to remind everyone to keep things low key. We used to go to my in laws on both Xmas eve and Xmas day. I told my husband 2 yrs ago that it was either one day or the other.  My in laws live about 30 minutes from us and it was just too much running back and forth.  Now we go to the in laws on Xmas day followed by a visit to my sister’s house which is only 5 minutes from them. So it works out much better.  We don't do a HUGE family party anymore because D just gets to worked up and he gets too stimmy both vocally and physically.  I let relatives know ahead of time not to get disappointed if they don't get the reaction over the gifts that they give to D.  He has never been a truck/car kid and yet every year, someone gets him a truck or a car and is crushed over his lack of enthusiasm.  (I tell everyone every year the things that he likes but there are always those relatives that think they "know better”)

PERSONAL CHRISTMAS TREES AND A LITTLE OF THE HOLIDAY SPIRITS! By ASO York Member Cenza

For the last couple of years I have had a small 3-foot Christmas tree for each of the kids with unbreakable ornaments that they are allowed to decorate and play with at their discretion.  The kids have their own little corner and a box of ornaments and this can keep my two busy for days decorating and playing with the ornaments on their tree - and - if it falls over - who cares - we just start over.

Also, those packaged cookies that you buy with the icing tube and decorations is also a good way to pass some time.  We make sure also to plan activities like walks and sleigh rides during the holidays.   D loves tobogganing (sensory I'm sure).

Also, get a sitter and plan at least one (if not more) night out with some adult company that don't have children with autism and drink your butt off!  This one's my favourite!!!  See if the sitter is available for the next morning too! (ESSENTIAL!) and have all ingredients for bloody marys available to get you going the next day or some Bailey's for your coffee!

HOLIDAY TRAVEL AND AUTISM
AUTISM AND AIRPORT TRAVEL SAFETY TIPS

November 23, 2001

Port St. Lucie, Florida

By Dennis Debbaudt

Traveling through airport security will never be the same. Every traveler passing through a security checkpoint will now encounter waiting in long lines, having to produce two forms of picture identification at multiple locations, mandatory questioning and inspections of personal belongings by strangers and the increasing likelihood of a light touch by stranger holding a Geiger counter-like sound producing wand. When you add to the mix the possibility of a complete physical frisk or pat down and the presence and scrutiny of armed, uniformed paramilitary personnel the accompanying sensory-enhancing gauntlet of sounds lights and touch can tax the system of any traveler let alone one who has autism. This experience has quickly become standard operating procedure at U.S. airports.

People with autism, parents and caregivers may want to consider taking some extra measures to make passing through a security checkpoint easier.

As daunting as a security checkpoint is for some children and adults with autism, we must consider the point-of-view of the security professional. The behavior or characteristics of the child or adult with autism may make the security professional extremely anxious. Consider the reliance on visual cues and innocent echolalia a person with autism may display, such as repeating a phrase observed on a close-by poster. At a security checkpoint that phrase might include words that cite the laws or warn against the use of the words "bomb threat" or "hijacking." Someone who repeats this phrase would quickly come under suspicion at a security checkpoint.  Those that repeat a question, run from or blanche at passing through a metal detector, or become over-anxious at attempts to touch them would also merit extra scrutiny. Left unexplained, the behaviors and characteristics of some person's with autism may delay their trip and cause unnecessary anxiety. These encounters are the types of situations that can easily escalate into misinterpretations, verbal and physical confrontations, physical containment and restraint.

As reported in my latest book, Autism, Advocates and Law Enforcement Professionals http://www.jkp.com/catalogue/book.php?isbn=1-85302-980-7

"Those with autism, parents and caregivers may want to consider carrying autism handout information which would at least include a basic autism brochure, and a person-specific handout that at least includes their picture, description, information about behaviors that security may find suspicious and the best way a security professional can communicate with or interact with that person. Many parents find business card handouts that might contain a message such as 'Perhaps my son/daughter's behavior is surprising to you.  This is because he/she has autism', a brief definition of autism, and the phone number/website address of a local or national advocacy organization."

These are grass roots, one-on-one autism awareness campaigns. Make sure to carry enough generic information to leave behind with the security professionals you may encounter. Anyone reading this message can download the informational handout "Educating the Community...and Law Enforcement" at http://www.policeandautism.cjb.net/ make copies and hand them out. An expanded version of this handout and other awareness and educational materials are available in my new book.

If possible, make travel plans well in advance. Call the airlines and security companies (soon to be mainly federalized) and ask what you can do to help the security experience go more smoothly for the person with autism and the security professionals they will interact with. If the trip has to be made suddenly, arrive extra early, bring plenty of handouts and explain to the gate agent what your needs are.

Those that have the time may want to inquire with their air carrier about assistance plans they may offer inexperienced travelers. Northwest Airlines, for example, offers the Adult Assistance Program for a fee ranging from $40.00 to $75.00. This may prove to be money well spent. The program offers personal assistance from check-in, through security and boarding and through the destination airport. While the program does not assist with eating, personal hygiene or medication issues, it does provide assistance through the crucial security checkpoints. Parents and caregivers of a passenger using travel assist can also pass through security with their loved even if they are not traveling with them. Special security passes would be issued in lieu of tickets. A program like Northwest Airlines' Adult Assistance could be utilized by caregivers even if they are traveling with a loved one.

Anticipating the worst is never a pleasant proposition. But it's something we do all the time in our everyday lives when we put on seat belts, lock our back doors, pay the life insurance. The downside for not doing these things is extremely negative in each example. But do we shudder in fear every time we do these things? Of course not. They are common sense options associated with everyday life.

Taking extra precautions is also an everyday consideration that those with autism that can, parents and caregivers also become accustomed to taking. When traveling through our communities, and airports, taking the precautions--alerting security, carrying ID and informational handouts, considering the needs of others, anticipating possibilities--can help make our trips and travel a lot safer and a lot more relaxing. Give yourself at least two weeks to seek the best that our airlines and airport security can offer. But it's never too late to alert the airlines and security professionals to a special request for assistance.

Contact author at: ddpi@flash.net

Copyright 2001 by Dennis Debbaudt

Contact author for reprint permission.

(Special thanks to Mike Flotteron of Northwest Airlines for his assistance in preparing this report. Most major airlines offer programs similar to the Adult Assistance Program. Check with your air carrier about special travelers services they offer)

Reprinted with permission from the author

CARING SISTER TO AN ADULT MAN WITH ASD By ASO York member Susan

My family has always felt that Christmas is a very important time for family and outdoor activity. For many years my brother, R (who is non-verbal and has autism) was really the centre of attention. Then in 1991, when he was 37 years old, my daughter was born. The next year, my other daughter arrived. Suddenly R was no longer the centre of attention, and we all tried very hard to make this transition successful.

He loved to help me change them as small babies, as long as dirty diapers were not involved! He especially enjoyed doing the snaps and zippers up on their sleepers. As they grew bigger he was a little more cautious of them, seeming to be afraid of their unpredictable movements. To make him comfortable, he was in charge of pushing the stroller (they were tied down there), and pulling them on the sled (which he would tip into the snow when he was tired - they have always thought that was funny). He rides on the sled with them down the hill now (something he used to do with my sister and I when we were little). For him, as for many adults, having children around seems to encourage him to be very active - going for walks, going skating, sledding, etc. They really feel that if they are going to be outside playing, he should be too. Although I think he probably sighs with relief when they go home (as do the other adults), I think he enjoys them pushing him to do things with them.  Since they are the only children in the next generation they feel strongly that Rick should know them, and they know him, since they tell me that when I am gone R will come to their house for Christmas.

THINGS WE DO By BBB Member Tina

R and K are pretty mellow so visiting isn't that much of a hassle for us.  It’s the long vacation form school routines that are killers. We also have to deal with R's birthday during the holidays as well.

As far as the days off from school I find keeping them busy with seasonal crafts is fun for them.

I went to dollar store recently and got fixings for crafts that R suggested.

Stockings: minis that can hang on trees...made from red Bristol board, cotton balls, glitter glue to put names or decorate with stars etc.

Fairly easy to make: I drew a stocking and traced several out on Bristol board. I think I yielded about 30 of them per sheet. Then we take cotton balls and stretch them out so they go farther and glue them to top of stocking as the white trim. We use the glitter glue to put names one them and then I glue a piece of string in a loop on back so it can hang on the tree.
R also asked to make snowmen.  We are using Styrofoam balls for this. I haven’t made one yet so can't give details on how to assemble. Styrofoam balls, silver glitter, yarn and black beads...going to try to make some small scarves for them too.  Using pipe cleaners for arms.

And we decided to make wreaths for teachers this year.  This is more detailed and needs more help from older sister and me to assemble.

Need wooden wreaths.  I can get them at craft stores, small ornaments, balls, bows, candy canes, bead garlands, anything can be used as long as its not too big.  Ribbons too.  I try to lay out the ornaments symmetrically so its not lopsided and then use hot glue to stick them on.

I did something similar to this a couple of years ago to my wedding bouquet. Artificial flowers that were in my closet are now displayed on a heart shaped wreath beside a cross-stitched wedding announcement.

Anyway this is one thing we do to keep the holidays fun and less boredom for them.

The week after Christmas we deal with setting rules for certain toys ...then R's birthday.

The leftover vacation we get the kids out to the toboggan hill or play outside in the snow...my kids love making snow angels and then painting them so mommy can take pictures.  We use water paint-to-paint snow.sponges to put paint on...

We may even get to the movies...we hit the charity days on Sunday when admission is only 2.00 per person and it goes to a local charity like school fundraising projects or lions club.

Anyway that's the planned things we always do.  We try to play it by ear on what else to do based on moods etc.

Looking forward to hearing everyone else's winter vacation tips and plans!

HELPFUL LINKS 

o        Teens Health – How to Handle Holiday Expectations: http://www.kidshealth.org/PageManager.jsp?dn=KidsHealth&lic=1&ps=207&cat_id=&article_set=22106
o        Surviving Holiday Stress: http://stress.about.com/cs/holidaysurvival/index.htm
o        Oh Christmas Tree! http://autism.about.com/library/weekly/aa122400a.htm
o        Fundraiser Christmas Cards for the Autism Society of Northwest Ohio: http://www.asno.org/christmas_cards!!!.htm
o        More Fundraiser Cards from the Scottish Autistic Society: http://www.autism-in-scotland.org.uk/merchandise/xmascards.html
o        Gift Ideas from Graduate Beginnings http://www.picturecommunication.com/
o        How to Buy Gifts for the ASD Child http://www.bbbautism.com/vol_2_iss_4_gifts.htm
o        Why My Son (15) Hates Christmas http://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/0,,2-2001552541,00.html
o        For those ambitious souls, here is a website with Christmas recipes from around the world: http://www.santas.net/recipes.htm
o        Hanukkah recipes: http://www.our-daily-bread.com/recipes/category/hanukkah.htm
o        Kwanzaa recipes: http://members.tripod.com/~Nancy_J/kwanzaa.htm

8 BEAUTIFUL GIFTS…
Posted by BBB Member Becca

1) THE GIFT OF LISTENING...
But you must REALLY listen.
No interrupting, no daydreaming,
no planning your response.
Just listening.

2) THE GIFT OF AFFECTION...
Be generous with appropriate hugs,
kisses, pats on the back and handholds.
Let these small actions demonstrate the
love you have for family and friends.

3) THE GIFT OF LAUGHTER...
Clip cartoons.
Share articles and funny stories.
Your gift will say,
"I love to laugh with you."

4) THE GIFT OF A WRITTEN NOTE...
It can be a simple
"Thanks for the help" note
or a full sonnet.
A brief, handwritten note may be
remembered for a lifetime,
and may even change a life.

5) THE GIFT OF A COMPLIMENT...
A simple and sincere,
"You look great in red,"
"You did a super job"
or "That was a wonderful meal"
can make someone's day.

6) THE GIFT OF A FAVOR...
Every day, go out of your way
to do something kind.

7) THE GIFT OF SOLITUDE...
There are times when we want nothing
better than to be left alone.
Be sensitive to those times and give
the gift of solitude to others.

8) THE GIFT OF A CHEERFUL DISPOSITION...
The easiest way to feel good is
to extend a kind word to someone.
Really, it's not that hard to say
Hello or Thank You